I’m back today after a weeks sabbatical. My wife informed me that a BLURG needs to be updated daily. Well, its been a long week and I got the most inspiration to write while sitting in a boring class.
First, here is another story about Mrs. Talkuh.
We have this class for 6-7 hours on Saturday and 4 hours on Friday night. Yes, it’s so exciting to be here. Let’s have a moment of respect for the makers of the laptop. If not for this nice Compaq computer in front of me, I would probably be chewing my own skin off my hand.
Mrs. Talkuh, did it again last night. She stepped out for a potty break, and I did so as well a few minutes later. As I walked out of our room she was returning.
Now - let’s step back for a minute and put the funny part of this moment together.
Friday night we meet in a room on the 3rd floor of a building at UNLV. Our room we are in Friday is right across the hall from the room we meet in for Saturday. Easy to remember right? One night here and the next day, there. Right across the hall, simple. Well, good ol Talkuh demonstrated her swiftness again. I exited our Friday night room (where everyone was sitting) and Talkuh was returning.
Talkuh, instead of coming back to our room approached the Saturday room (right across the hall). This might have been excusable as a small mistake.
HOWEVER!, she caught my eye and made visual contact with me (right as I was leaving our current room), then proceeded to enter the Saturday room.
Oh Talkuh, poor Talkuh. How do you function?
Here is the best part. Talkuh, enters the Saturday room, (and by this time I have stopped mid hallway to witness the show) and then discovers the room is filled with complete strangers. These strangers are of course students in another class.
Insult to major injury now, is that there was a male professor lecturing rather loudly. You could hear the lecture through the propped open door. So now, Talkuh stands for exactly 2 uncomfortable and blank seconds before she blurts out, “Uuuoohhh..”.
Now, at this point I have decided that I would actually pay money to see more moments like this. It’s tragically hilarious to encounter such mind numbing people like this.
So there you have the weekly story of the mis-adventures of Talkuh. She and her husband by the way had matching red sweaters on. They might have been going to a Sadie Hawkins dance after, who knows?
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Saturday, March 1, 2008
More about the same class
Remember the gal that I made so much fun of in class in the last BLURG?
Well, this particular gal has her particular husband next to her in class. Well, never before has the phrase “birds of feather flock together..”
This dude is your stereotypical nerd. He’s got that chubby computer guy thing going on.
-Pants are pulled up past the bellybutton.
-We’ve also caught him snorting while he laughs a few times.
-He’s been guilty of jumping up to help with the technology in the classroom when it goes crazy.
Our teacher had a few hassles with getting some things turned on, switched over, etc.
Well then this Poindexter leaps out of his seat and quickly waddles to the front “Lets see… This is interesting phenomenon I’ve seen… This s how you do it…”. And before you know it, he’s shoved the professor out of the way, and he’s bent half over with eyes squinted looking intently at every blinking thing in the room assessing things. Then he whips 3 flash drives out of his fanny pack ready to back up some data and save the day.
You know these dudes, they start sweating immediately at I love to watch him fumble about looking more like a dork than really helping.
Well, the professor put us in groups at the end of class just now and we unknowingly were segregated into all boy and girl groups. All we did was discuss some mini articles.
After we finished the professor commented that she did not know that she put us in girl and boy groups.
Well the husband of Mrs. “Talk..uh….” blurts out:
“Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina!... (voiced in a little kid manner)”
…Obvious reference to the old movie Kindergarten Cop.
Well, I had an immediate picture in my mind of Steve Carrel playing the idiot boss from The Office. You know; the poor stupid guy who just sticks his foot way too far in his mouth all the time.
I invite you all to visit with me next week this class, and see what I’m talking about.
I’m not making this up. I’m really not.
My borrowed tuition money is being put to some good use I’d say here.
Peace out everyone
B
Well, this particular gal has her particular husband next to her in class. Well, never before has the phrase “birds of feather flock together..”
This dude is your stereotypical nerd. He’s got that chubby computer guy thing going on.
-Pants are pulled up past the bellybutton.
-We’ve also caught him snorting while he laughs a few times.
-He’s been guilty of jumping up to help with the technology in the classroom when it goes crazy.
Our teacher had a few hassles with getting some things turned on, switched over, etc.
Well then this Poindexter leaps out of his seat and quickly waddles to the front “Lets see… This is interesting phenomenon I’ve seen… This s how you do it…”. And before you know it, he’s shoved the professor out of the way, and he’s bent half over with eyes squinted looking intently at every blinking thing in the room assessing things. Then he whips 3 flash drives out of his fanny pack ready to back up some data and save the day.
You know these dudes, they start sweating immediately at I love to watch him fumble about looking more like a dork than really helping.
Well, the professor put us in groups at the end of class just now and we unknowingly were segregated into all boy and girl groups. All we did was discuss some mini articles.
After we finished the professor commented that she did not know that she put us in girl and boy groups.
Well the husband of Mrs. “Talk..uh….” blurts out:
“Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina!... (voiced in a little kid manner)”
…Obvious reference to the old movie Kindergarten Cop.
Well, I had an immediate picture in my mind of Steve Carrel playing the idiot boss from The Office. You know; the poor stupid guy who just sticks his foot way too far in his mouth all the time.
I invite you all to visit with me next week this class, and see what I’m talking about.
I’m not making this up. I’m really not.
My borrowed tuition money is being put to some good use I’d say here.
Peace out everyone
B
Class Today
Well I am sitting in a class right now on Saturday morning (with my laptop) at UNLV. This is my life for the last 3 years. Fortunately, I earned my Masters of Education in Special Education from UNLV last December. And my awesome wife earned her Masters in Public Health, at the same time. Yah, we are proud of that!
We graduated the same day, and had our 2 girls go through the whole process with us. I am still taking classes for beefing up my license I will get by the Fall. Its ongoing and perpetual I guess being a teacher. You can always up your availability with endorsements and what not. So that’s what I am up to today.
I’m sitting in a class talking, and listening, rolling my eyes. Then slight variations of those things. The class I am currently in is a TESOL endorsement class. TESOL is an acronym for Teaching English Second something something Language. It’s a requirement that the state will require for all teachers in the next couple years to have. Las Vegas primarily and pretty much most classrooms in the Western United States will have the need for teachers to be qualified in accommodating students that are using English as a second language.
It’s a “red-tape hoop class” I call it. I’m not learning another language (because traditional white middle class people living in America are too lazy to learn another language – like me!), but I am supposedly getting qualified to help kids be up to speed with English based educational settings. So yes, it’s about as exciting as cleaning your oven.
However I am surrounded by a few other students today that have peaked my disappointment in not only the state of humanity, but my interest on telling a few entertaining stories about these guys.
Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy my classes and what I am learning. But some of these students (who ironically are teaching others) really redefine the “mouth-breathing” factor.
There is one gal in particular (get it straight you ninnies right now that I am not sexist) in the front row that really let the 2 brain cells she harbors get into a burly fight.
So my professor led a simulated discussion between her (acting as an elementary teacher), and us (acting as 2nd grade students). This was a simulation according to facilitating getting English Language Learners (ELL) to verbalize new words and their ending sounds. Pretty easy right?
Here is the dialog (I wrote as fast as I could because this was so hilarious.)
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
Ok class, I want you all to think of a word that has the same ending sound as the word “map”. “Map… (puh..puh…)”.
Students (Us, the graduate students):
“Trap, clap, tap, etc..”
Gal in the front say’s:
“Talk!.. (kuh..kuh..)”
She was serious my friends. The professor gave her this stare that was obviously disappointing. She looked at the gal in the front for an uncomfortable 4 seconds and says sarcastically: “PUH..PUH..”
This gal’s capacity of teaching is getting grade 9-12 students the content to get their GED. She teaches the students that are high school dropouts, and trying to get the basics done to get their GED’s. Oh, how scary is this world. Maybe NCLB (No child left behind) for teachers is not all that bad.
And guess what? She kept up this display.
Next simulation consisted of trying to explain to ELL’s how to use mnemonics in English class.
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
Ok class, I want you all to think of a mnemonic for the word “fiction”. Fiction is not real, etc. So what would you say or sound out to help you remember what “fiction” means? How about using and sounding the word “FFFake”. “FFFake..FFFiction…FFFake…Fiction”. There’s your mnemonic. So class, what would you use?
Another Student:
“FFFalse…FFFiction…FFFalse…Fiction…”
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
Very good, anyone else?
Gal in the front say’s:
“FFFictitious…that’s like Fiction…FFFictitious…”
AAAAUUUGGHHH!!! What is this gal doing in education!!!!
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
“Um, that’s the same word (name omitted), and it’s a synonym.”
Sometimes I tell my wife that if you could be allowed in life, to punch someone in the face as hard as you can just once (for being unbelievably stupid), I would use all those punches on this gal.
I’m going to keep my kids far from anyone who has any involvement with the hiring, mentoring, training, and placement of this ignoramus in a classroom with other human beings.
Sorry if I sound mean as snot, but come on everyone… why why why are some folks allowed to go through life with uninhibited lack of common sense. You can be stupid, and that’s ok. But talking and verbally demonstrating your stupidity is literally sinful in my world. I’m pretty stupid in some things I think. But I know when to hold it back and just figure “I’ll learn that later”.
I’ve told a lot of people this, and those who have gone through the process of a higher education program know one thing that’s pretty true.
That is, if you can sound intelligent and converse with accelerated vocabulary you have mastered most of what is required of university degrees. In addition to that to have the ability to write and convey those verbal skills to paper. Seriously, if your educated and have some significant experience in something, others will know that by the way you speak and write.
You can surmise a lot about someone by their BLURG’s too.
Are you using these words more than once in less than 3 paragraphs?:
Cute
Awesome
Whatever
Dude
Suck
Blog
Totally
OK
Then you better get a thesaurus or get into a book club. If you don’t you might wind up in this gal’s class learning how the letter’s k and p are the same.
Once again,
Thanks for reading this far if you have.
Brian…………………. (Start being heard everyone!!!)
We graduated the same day, and had our 2 girls go through the whole process with us. I am still taking classes for beefing up my license I will get by the Fall. Its ongoing and perpetual I guess being a teacher. You can always up your availability with endorsements and what not. So that’s what I am up to today.
I’m sitting in a class talking, and listening, rolling my eyes. Then slight variations of those things. The class I am currently in is a TESOL endorsement class. TESOL is an acronym for Teaching English Second something something Language. It’s a requirement that the state will require for all teachers in the next couple years to have. Las Vegas primarily and pretty much most classrooms in the Western United States will have the need for teachers to be qualified in accommodating students that are using English as a second language.
It’s a “red-tape hoop class” I call it. I’m not learning another language (because traditional white middle class people living in America are too lazy to learn another language – like me!), but I am supposedly getting qualified to help kids be up to speed with English based educational settings. So yes, it’s about as exciting as cleaning your oven.
However I am surrounded by a few other students today that have peaked my disappointment in not only the state of humanity, but my interest on telling a few entertaining stories about these guys.
Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy my classes and what I am learning. But some of these students (who ironically are teaching others) really redefine the “mouth-breathing” factor.
There is one gal in particular (get it straight you ninnies right now that I am not sexist) in the front row that really let the 2 brain cells she harbors get into a burly fight.
So my professor led a simulated discussion between her (acting as an elementary teacher), and us (acting as 2nd grade students). This was a simulation according to facilitating getting English Language Learners (ELL) to verbalize new words and their ending sounds. Pretty easy right?
Here is the dialog (I wrote as fast as I could because this was so hilarious.)
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
Ok class, I want you all to think of a word that has the same ending sound as the word “map”. “Map… (puh..puh…)”.
Students (Us, the graduate students):
“Trap, clap, tap, etc..”
Gal in the front say’s:
“Talk!.. (kuh..kuh..)”
She was serious my friends. The professor gave her this stare that was obviously disappointing. She looked at the gal in the front for an uncomfortable 4 seconds and says sarcastically: “PUH..PUH..”
This gal’s capacity of teaching is getting grade 9-12 students the content to get their GED. She teaches the students that are high school dropouts, and trying to get the basics done to get their GED’s. Oh, how scary is this world. Maybe NCLB (No child left behind) for teachers is not all that bad.
And guess what? She kept up this display.
Next simulation consisted of trying to explain to ELL’s how to use mnemonics in English class.
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
Ok class, I want you all to think of a mnemonic for the word “fiction”. Fiction is not real, etc. So what would you say or sound out to help you remember what “fiction” means? How about using and sounding the word “FFFake”. “FFFake..FFFiction…FFFake…Fiction”. There’s your mnemonic. So class, what would you use?
Another Student:
“FFFalse…FFFiction…FFFalse…Fiction…”
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
Very good, anyone else?
Gal in the front say’s:
“FFFictitious…that’s like Fiction…FFFictitious…”
AAAAUUUGGHHH!!! What is this gal doing in education!!!!
Elementary Teacher (my professor):
“Um, that’s the same word (name omitted), and it’s a synonym.”
Sometimes I tell my wife that if you could be allowed in life, to punch someone in the face as hard as you can just once (for being unbelievably stupid), I would use all those punches on this gal.
I’m going to keep my kids far from anyone who has any involvement with the hiring, mentoring, training, and placement of this ignoramus in a classroom with other human beings.
Sorry if I sound mean as snot, but come on everyone… why why why are some folks allowed to go through life with uninhibited lack of common sense. You can be stupid, and that’s ok. But talking and verbally demonstrating your stupidity is literally sinful in my world. I’m pretty stupid in some things I think. But I know when to hold it back and just figure “I’ll learn that later”.
I’ve told a lot of people this, and those who have gone through the process of a higher education program know one thing that’s pretty true.
That is, if you can sound intelligent and converse with accelerated vocabulary you have mastered most of what is required of university degrees. In addition to that to have the ability to write and convey those verbal skills to paper. Seriously, if your educated and have some significant experience in something, others will know that by the way you speak and write.
You can surmise a lot about someone by their BLURG’s too.
Are you using these words more than once in less than 3 paragraphs?:
Cute
Awesome
Whatever
Dude
Suck
Blog
Totally
OK
Then you better get a thesaurus or get into a book club. If you don’t you might wind up in this gal’s class learning how the letter’s k and p are the same.
Once again,
Thanks for reading this far if you have.
Brian…………………. (Start being heard everyone!!!)
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